…there’s always another Star Destroyer. The battle is never-ending. A victory for the Rebel Alliance, no matter how epic, doesn’t mean the end of the war. That’s a bit how I feel right now after finishing my 10,000-word submission for the Jim Henson Dark Crystal Author Quest. I feel like those cheering Rebels on Hoth right after they hear the announcement: “The first transport is away! The first transport is away!”
Yes, the first one made it through. And that feeling of victory when facing impossible odds is euphoric. But they have to try to get the rest through the blockade as well. And even if they make it off Hoth, the rest of the Empire is still out there, waiting for them.
This might not seem like a victory. After all, I’m just one among many. I have no idea what is going to happen next. Will my entry be considered? Accepted? Ultimately win or be rejected? I have no way of knowing. But I started writing my Dark Crystal entry 5 months ago. July 1, 2013, I used Camp NaNoWriMo to pound out half the novel. I kept writing all the way through September. October was sporadic writing followed by editing, then November was dedicated to my wonderful beta readers. Their feedback helped me chose what portion of the novel to send as my submission. I hit the “Submit Your Entry” button on November 30, exactly five months after starting this project.
I’m proud of what I’ve made. I really am. Part of wonders about the battles ahead. But most of all…I feel relief. I know that I worked hard on this. And I even think it’s pretty good. In fact, I don’t think I could have done better as I am right now, with the constraints I had. So for now, I’m content to just leave the manuscript tucked away in my filing cabinet and not write for a month.
Yep. I’m taking December off. No more long projects, no diving back into The Mariner Sequence or working on Astral Rain or any of that. Two fanfic chapters are all I’ll be doing (’cause writing fan fiction is like eating candy: easy and sweet.) And giving myself a month to just relax and not worry about my literary future, to watch TV and read trashy fantasy novels and play with my cats and get everything in my new domicile organized before the new year…bliss. Heck, I might even start drawing again!
But why? If I love writing so much, why would I need a break? Because everyone needs a break sometimes, even from what they love. Otherwise, we’d get sick of it. I worked hard these past few months; nearly burned myself out again. And I hate that feeling of being dried up and empty inside. Of reaching into your own subconscious and finding nothing. No inspiration, no words, only endless static. I’ve been there and it’s awful. So I’m going to take a break and do things that aren’t related to writing so I have a chance to relax and recharge. Hopefully then I’ll be in a better position to tackle life’s challenges when I come back from my little vacation and plunge back into writing once more.
…and I’ll return. I promise.